4 Tips to Have Money Conversations In Marriage
Trying to take control of your money but have having a hard time getting your spouse on board?
Do you find it awkward or uncomfortable when you try to discuss the state of your finances?
Does money often cause arguments in your relationship?
Looking to change the future of your finances but need a little help getting the conversation going?
It’s difficult when you find yourself in any of the above situations, but fear not! We are here to help. Try some of these quick tips below:
1. Ask your spouse – What are some of your short term and long term goals/dreams?
This question will allow them to open up about where they want to go, and it will help cultivate conversation on how the two of you plan to get there.
2. Dedicate a regular time you both can agree that will be set aside to talk about finances.
The frequency will depend on your needs as a couple, but setting up a time to talk regularly allows each spouse to mentally prepare for the conversation and come up with different points they may want to discuss on the matter.
3. Total up all your debts, assets, current cash flow and look at your monthly expenses. Start crunching some numbers to get a better status of your current financial situation. You can look at:
- What does 6 months of expenses look like?
This was EXTREMELY eye opening to us. With money flowing in and out of our account on a monthly basis, we didn’t realize how much it takes to maintain our lifestyle.
- What are our average utility bills? Have any of our bills gone up?
This will help you be more aware of your costs and keep from being overcharged. If you are not careful, your bills may start going up once a promotion has ended and you are signed up for a service you did not want to pay for. Don’t be taken advantage of because of ignorance.
- What expenses are we paying for on a monthly basis that we can do without?
This can be tricky – one spouse may feel something is worth paying for while the other does not. This is not meant to start more arguments, but to discuss expenses that you both feel are non-negotiable, and others that are more luxurious to put things in perspective for both of you.
4. Create a pros & cons list regarding your financial goals.
Show your spouse the benefits, but ask them for their thoughts and opinions. Allow them to have a voice, and be willing to compromise so you both are happy. If these are goals you both want to achieve, it will be much easier to make progress.
Remember: these are just tips to get the conversation going, not necessarily solutions. Like anything else, the more you do it, the easier it will get. Money doesn’t have to be an argumentative topic if you train it to be positive, and treat it like a resource to grab the future you are looking for.