Throughout the Bible we see other examples of counterfeits as well as warnings against involving ourselves with them. Proverbs 16:25 says “There is a way which seems right to a man and appears straight before him, but at the end of it is the way of death.”
Coming from personal experience, here are the 4 stages that took place for me when I fell for a counterfeit.
Attraction. Attraction is the first step and most dangerous because it will open the door to further deceit. Often times our attraction toward someone can be based off of lust that has taken root in our heart and we can become attracted to someone’s physical appearance as well as the accessories that come with them. In my experience of a man I dated, I quickly became attracted to his appearance as well as his money, car, home, materials, and lifestyle. I was very attracted to his possessions which later on allowed me to realize that lust for worldly desires was the main cause of my attraction.
2. Blindness. Once a strong attraction develops you may begin to ignore any warning signs that this person is not right for you because you have become emotionally attached. Having a strong emotional attachment will blind you to the warning signs and you will become desensitized to them. Being blinded to warning signs due to your emotions leads to a false reality. The guy I dated had many things that attracted me to him, but in reality there were several red flags that I noticed. Because of my attraction to him and the way he made me feel, I began to ignore the red flags and pursue a relationship based off of the strong feelings that had taken over.
Commitment. After your emotions take control and you become blinded to the red flags, commitment follows. Men will do nice things for women such as take them out on dates or buy them expensive gifts. Because of the things he has done for you, you may begin to feel like you owe him yourself. You may start to feel pressured and give in to things you know that he wants and start to regret it. The guy I dated took me out, bought me things, which in return made me feel as though I owed him back and needed to commit to him.
- Entrapment. Over time, more things about this man will be exposed and who he truly is will be brought to the surface. The red flags that you ignored earlier will become alarms that are going off in your mind. Commitment will eventually turn into a relationship that you become trapped in. You have become so emotionally tied to him that you feel like you can’t live without him, but become more aware that this man is a counterfeit and being involved with him is only hurting you. I eventually came to the realization that I needed to stop ignoring the red flags so I could save myself. I began to feel trapped because my emotions kept me there. I did not want to be involved with this man anymore. Our lifestyles did not match up, he was not what I wanted, he did not value me like he should have, and was attempting to lead me to sin instead of drawing me closer to God.